News and such...

Sorry for the lack of entries, but life has caught up to me. First off, I can't surf at work. They monitor the internet usage, and seeing as how that's supporting me I'm not gonna jeopardize it. Combine that with school, etc and I am just one busy busy girl!! A. had his 6 month appt today, and according to their scales he's up to 15 lbs 9 oz. That puts him at the 25th percentile, not bad for a kid who started out at 3 lbs!

Big news is my baby brother is *finally* coming home!!! He's been stationed in Japan for about 3 years now, I haven't seen him since then. He's visiting dad and his inlaws, but will be here on Tuesday. I will be meeting his wife and son for the first time. I hate meeting new people, I'm always so awkward and end up either sounding snobby or stupid. I had a stutter as a kid, and the only time it registers now is if I get really really nervous (which is every time I'm around people I don't know) I want to like her, if only for the fact that I want my brothers and I to remain close. It seems kind of weird that I spent most of my life with one group of people and now that I'm 'grown up' (term used very loosely folks) I'm supposed to transfer my life to an entirely new set of people. It feels like I'm in a metaphorical ill fitting outfit. I'm trying to adjust to this new status quo, but it doesn't quite 'fit'. Maybe it's more like a new pair of shoes, it just needs to be broken in.

I was thinking earlier about my marriage. My husband and I have had it rough for pretty much our whole married life, job wise at least. Now that I'm working again, I'm seeing all these 'successful' men, and I've wondered what my life would be like if I was married to one of them. Then it hit me, part of the reason my husband and I are together, comfortable with each other is *because* of what we have gone through. No we don't have the passionate whirlwind life that I so naively imagined when I was younger. We do have a stable loving relationship. I have a husband who knows what kind of mood I'm in just by looking at me, we can have entire conversations without saying a word. The external pressures (money) have forced us to bond together, and I think have made us closer for it. We now appreciate what we have all the more, because we know what it's like to be without. Hopefully, this new job will be the first step in us getting more financially secure as that has really been the major 'problem area' of our marriage so far. I can only hope that our life will continue to grow together, and that one day we can look back at this early struggling and laugh. Maybe all the crud we've gone through so far has built us up one big whopping kharmic payoff. Hey I can dream can't I?